Wat Phra That Lampang Luang: Lonely class….
Lampang is not only one of the largest cities in Northern Thailand, but has almost as many cultural and historical attractions as Chiang Mai. The most important piece of heritage is without a doubt Wat Phra That Lampang Luang. This temple complex originates almost as far back in time as the city of Lampang.
Three friends traveled together and traded. But things were not going well anymore, they lost all their money and had no money to travel home. They asked to live in the temple and stayed for three years. Got to eat and if there was something to do, they did that of course. But after three years they wanted to return home, but had no travel money. Yes, what now?
One of the monks bought a horse, a mare. And one day he sewed that animal. The novice we already talked about saw that… And that was a cunning kid! When night fell, he said to the monk, 'Venerable One, I will bring some grass for the horse.' 'Excuse me? No, not you. You must be making a mess. I'd better do it myself.' He cut grass, fed the horse, stood behind it and sewed it again.
The novice from the previous story had a beautiful sister. Two monks from the temple had a crush on her and the novice knew it. He was a mischievous novice and wanted to play a prank on those monks. Every time he went home he took some to the temple and said that his sister had given it to him. 'My sister gave these cigarettes for you,' he said to one. And to the other 'These rice cakes are from my sister, for you.'
What happend? A monk fell in love with I Uj. And whenever she brought food to the temple, he told the temple helpers and the novices to set her food aside. He only ate the food she offered.
Why Tha was called 'Poepbroek' (From: Stimulating stories from Northern Thailand; nr 15)
This is about two brothers. Their father gave them something on his deathbed. He gave each son 1.000 baht and said, "From my death, every meal you eat must be a good meal." Then he took his last breath.
This is about two neighbors. One was not religious, the other was and was also an honest person. They were friends. The religious man placed an altar against the wall of his porch with a statue of Buddha in it. Every morning he offered rice and showed respect to Buddha, and in the evening after dinner he did it again.
The meditating hermit and women's breasts (From: Stimulating stories from Northern Thailand; nr 12)
This story is about a hermit who had reached the jhana (*). This hermit had been meditating in a forest for twenty thousand years and he had reached jhana. That means that when he was hungry and thinking about food, he felt satisfied. If he wanted to go somewhere, he only had to think about it and … hoppa! … he was already there. Sat there meditating for twenty thousand years. The grass was already higher than his ears but he just stayed put.
This story is from the Karen lore. It's about a Thai man and a Karen man who were great buddies. This story is also about sex. Thai people, you know, they always have a plan ready. Resourceful people!
A vagina full of china snails (From: Tantalizing stories from Northern Thailand; no. 10)
In this story again someone who wants to have sex with his young sister-in-law, just like in story number 2. But this time mister uses a different method. We will call him brother-in-law because no name is known.
Another story about Grandpa Tan, now together with Grandpa Daeng, his neighbor. Grandpa Daeng bred ducks and had four to five hundred of them. He kept the ducks on his field, which was next to Grandpa Tan's field.
Do you drink rich? People say liquor is bad for you, but it's not that bad! A drink can contribute to your life. It can make you rich, you know!
About alcohol in heaven and a bald jerk in hell (from: Stimulating stories from Northern Thailand; nr 7)
Grandpa Kaew drank all day long. From getting up to going to sleep. He drank three hip flasks of liquor a day. Three! Together more than half a liter. And he never went to the temple. In fact, he didn't even know where the temple was! Gifts for the temple and thamboen, never heard of it. As soon as he got up in the morning he drank a bottle; one after lunch and one in the evening. And that every day.
The poor man and the civet cat (from: Tantalizing stories from Northern Thailand; nr 6)
The poor man had a very small paddy field and could barely provide for his own food. The god Indra took pity on him and hid a beautiful woman in an elephant's tusk and dropped it in his field. He found that tusk and took it to his cabin. He had no idea there was a woman hiding inside.
This is the story of a man who had sex with his buffalo. He temporarily lived in a shed on the rice field and as soon as he saw the chance he took the water buffalo! His wife, who brought him his food there, had seen him do this time and time again. She wasn't stupid at all, but what could she do about that?