How do you say "I really love you" in Thai?
Because Thai is a tonal language, you cannot express emotions by changing the tone, as in most European languages. Thai uses short words for this at the end of the sentence. I will discuss some of those 'emotional words' here. They are indispensable in good communication and are often not covered in textbooks.
Language is a means of communication
Language is a means of communication. In this communication two messages can generally be distinguished, a literal one ('I don't believe you') and an emotional one ('I really don't believe you anymore'), in which in the latter case annoyance and irritation are also expressed. Very often in everyday speech that emotion will be expressed by a special tone or emphasis. Think "No!" to your son who asks for a cookie again, 'Yes, yes' to someone who tells a nonsense story or 'Now it's enough!' to express your displeasure.
When you learn a new language, you rightly emphasize the literal message in the beginning. But if you don't manage to convey the emotional message fairly quickly, your language will become boring, flat and uninteresting and your conversation partner will have to guess at your emotions and they will quickly lose interest in what you are saying. Even a professor who is lecturing shows more emotions.
The Thai language is a special case as it is a tone language where the tone of each syllable determines the meaning of each word. If you use all kinds of tones in Thai to show your emotions, you change the meaning of your words and, in addition to the emotional, also the literal meaning of your words becomes incomprehensible. That is a pitfall that I also fall into regularly.
How do you do it in Thai? Of course, you can literally express your emotion "I'm angry that you haven't done your homework again." Or you can say, "Once again you didn't do your homework!" that is much more effective, everyone will sit up straight.
In Thai, the latter is not possible through a change in tone or emphasis, but through the use of short words at the end of the, otherwise unchanged, sentence. In what follows I will deal with some of those short words that I call 'emotional words'. They are indispensable in daily use, otherwise you will come across as rude, flat and uninterested, and no one will listen to you anymore. Of course you have to practice these words with a Thai, the phonetic representation is always only an approximation of the actual pronunciation. Listen and practice, don't be afraid to screw up sometimes.
(tones: a medium; à low; á high; â falling; ǎ rising)
Courtesy words
+ + + Yes/ Yes /จ๊ะ'khráp' 'kha' 'ca'
Yes 'khráp' (by men, often kháp) and Yes 'khâ' (by women, 'khá' after a question) we all know. ครับผม 'khráp phǒm' (by men), as an acknowledgment of a request or command, often used somewhat humorously as exaggerated courtesy and deference, as my son says 'Yes, Papa'.
The word is important จ๊ะ 'cá' (men and women), used against people with 'lower status' and children, but especially between people, equals, with an intimate or trusted relationship, partners or good friends, it radiates warmth.
If you're still saying "khráp" to your partner or close friends, you're really doing it wrong. yes 'caǎ' is between equals (or to children) a sign of affection. You should often say this to your loved one. More information 'Nóng, caǎ, pai noon mái, cá', 'Nong, dear, shall we go to bed?'
Men say to members of the royal family: more 'phayâkha' and women เพคะ 'pheekha'
Rude courtesies
+ + + Whoa /what /โว้ย 'wá' 'wâ' 'wóoj'
This is commonly used between teenagers, in soap operas and by drunks (as a sign of intimacy), but adults use it to express anger: ทำ อะไร วะ 'tham arai wá' 'What the hell are you doing?' against a burglar or the neighbor who dumps waste in your garden.
Requests and apologies
+ + + ด้วย 'doêay' , softens a request or apology.
| More information | 'khǒthôt doêay' | followed by ná khráp/khâ | Sorry! |
| More information | 'chek bin doeay' | na khráp/kha | Can I have the check please? |
| ช่วย ดัวย | 'choeay doeay' | Help! |
+ + + ซิ 'sí', softens a request.
| More information | 'cheun nâng sí khráp' | Have a seat. |
| ดูซิ | 'do si' | Come and have a look. |
| พูด อีกที ซิ | 'phôed iek thie sí' | Would you say that again? |
+ + + หน่อย 'nòy', also softens a request or question.
| ขอดูหน่อย | 'khǒ do nòy' | Can I see it please?' |
| More information | 'phôet cháa cháa nòy dâay may' | Could you please speak more slowly? |
| See more | 'chôeay pìt thie wie nòy' | Please turn off the TV! |
+ + + ซี่ 'sîe' with a long 'ieie' and falling, emphasis tone is really a command.
| นั่งซี่ | 'nâng sie' | Sit down! |
| More information | 'pìt pratoe sîe' | Close the door! |
Other short end words
+++ 'la'This is a contraction of 'láew', al or already, and indicates a state reached.
| พอละ | 'pho la' | That's enough. |
| ถูก ละ | 'thoek lá' | That's right. |
| ดี ละ | 'di la' | Which is good. |
| เอา ละ | 'aw la' | OK, let's do that! |
The combination with more'ièk shows a slight irritation.
| มาอีกละ | 'maa iek lá' | Here he comes again! |
| See more | 'Sǒmchaay ièk lá' | There's Somchaay again! |
| See more | 'arai ik la' | What now? |
+++ 'lâ' Often comes after a question, insisting on an answer.
| ทำไม ล่ะ | 'thammay la' | Why? |
| More information | 'pay nǎy lâ' | Where are you going? |
Or with a certain irritation ('Why the hell………?').
| More information | 'thammay tông pay bòk kháw lâ' | Why the hell did you go tell her? |
Or to change the subject of conversation (with 'láew').
| See more | 'láew khoen lâ' | And you? |
+++ 'after'
This is by far the most commonly used end word. It softens an opinion, request or command, it seeks approval, consent and compromise. It is an empathetic word par excellence. Women use it more often, Yingluck even very often. It is sometimes a sign of insecurity.
| See more | 'yà krood na' | Please don't be angry. |
| ไปละนะ | 'pay la na' | I'm going already. |
| More information | 'yàa bòk theu na' | Don't tell her, okay? |
| See more | 'chan rak theu na' | I really love you, you know. |
Sometimes it requires repetition or explanation.
| อะไร นะ | 'aray na' | Sorry what did you say? |
| ไคร นะ | 'khray na' | Who was that again? |
+ + + 'ley' That reinforces what you said before.
| หมด เลย | 'mòd leuy' | All up! |
| More information | 'sǒeay m̂aak leuy' | She is really very beautiful! |
+++ 'ròk' or 'lòk To contradict someone's opinion.
| See more | 'may tong lòk' | You really don't have to. |
| See more | 'may phaeng lòk' | I really don't think it's that expensive. |
| See more | 'may chai lòk' | Not at all! |
A hesitant acceptance of someone's opinion.
| More information | 'kô cing lòk tàe….' | That is true but…..” |
It sometimes expresses sarcasm or irritation.
| More information | 'pen pho toea yaang lòk' | That's a model dad! |
| See more | 'phǒm phôet dâay eeng lòk | I can speak very well for myself! |
What do you do with such a list? Learn to use some of them, especially 'after', be especially aware that these words are often used, listen and ape. Then it will work itself out……….And to think that there are many more…….and that also the ones mentioned with a different tone can mean something else.
Tino,
Of course again great admiration for the time you all put in to teach those Dutch and Flemish friends about the Thai language and also about the standards and values of a Thai, especially when it comes to language use.
With all good intentions. Do you really think that the retired expat over the age of 65 is interested in that. They are already happy that they can greet someone, pay the bill, order a beer on their Thai, tell them that the weather is very hot today, ask someone how they are doing, or whatever Thais often do, where are you going. And the last good luck (choke that one). Of course it is written.
Your great story is very important for young expats who have to earn a living in Thai society.
Cor van Kampen.
I would not automatically assume that other retirees are equally uninterested in these soft, beautiful sides of the language, Cor. Has more to do with personality and character than with age......
My next, and last contribution for now because I'm going on holiday to the Netherlands, is about sex words. I hope that pensioners over the age of sixty-five might still be interested in that. What do you think?
A friend of mine wrote on Facebook last week: “no one says hi to my”.
I wrote back hi, hi, but later I wrote หี to which I received a very unexpected response.
So as far as I'm concerned bring on your words and the Thai spelling. Maybe next time it will save me from another blunder.
The word หี is not allowed by Peter. No dirty words, he said sternly. Sorry.
Tino, do you understand now how I fell on my face? And I'm just trying to speak and write a little Thai. Perhaps Jogchum is the wisest among us.
Tino,
Have a nice holiday. You're going to write another article with sex words, and you wrote maybe
pensioners over the age of sixty-five are interested in this.
I totally agree with Cor van Kampen that only young expacts who work in Thailand
should speak reasonable Thai. If you are retired here, then I think Thai is unimportant.
I have been in Thailand for 13 years and do not speak Thai, and for me that is better not because I like to talk about politics. You don't know what you can or cannot say.
Those sex words ……. well not necessary for me either ..
Well in that case you can always go golfing 😉
Khan Peter,
Golfing? I would much rather sit on a terrace with a Leo beer.
Already 13 years in Thailand and then don't speak the language at least a little, in fact: apparently not interested in it at all - I can't understand that. Doesn't exactly show interest in and respect for the country you chose for yourself………….
Comelis,
I don't speak much Thai indeed. To learn Thai well you need to spend at least a year here
Thailand to school. Plus being taught at home by a teacher for a very long time.
I really have no interest in that. Nevertheless, everyone is equally friendly to me.
I have read your contribution about the language, for which I thank you - I would also like to learn the Thai language for communication with my in-laws.
Now my question can you give me advice which textbook to use and if so where are they available.
Thank you very much for your response.
You learn most of course by dealing with Thai people. Ask, ask, repeat, try out and have fun.
A nice reference book for beginners, good explanation, practical short sentences, is David Smyth, Thai, an Essential Grammar, Routledge, New York, 2010 and the two dictionaries of LJM van Moergestel, Uitgeverij Nangsue, Zaandam. And furthermore, there are endless videos and stuff on the internet.
A wonderful list of 'emotional words' that everyone can benefit from.
By the way, Thai does use the pitch of phrases (as opposed to the tone of syllables) to express emotions, although this is not mentioned in the textbooks I've seen. However, it is easy to check by listening carefully.
What's not on the list is speaking in a loud tone – something that usually comes across as aggressive or demanding. The direct question, often used by the Dutch, without any option other than yes or no, also sounds rather unfriendly to Thai ears, and then requires addition with an appropriate 'emotional word',
In my experience, the แล้ว คุณ ละ (laeo khun la) is less an invitation to change the subject than a question about the experience etc. of the interlocutor with the same subject. I am teased about this myself: 'you certainly want to stay out of harm's way…'
What my example แล้วคุณละ (laew khun la) 'What about you?' I was indeed wrong, dear Alex, it means what you say. Thanks for the correction.
I should have chosen another example แล้ว เงิน ล่ะ (laew ngeun la) And what about the money?
Tino,
Once again I read your language contribution with great interest, but I am not yet 65 😉
How to put emotion into a conversation is indeed important and you don't see it covered that often.
What strikes me about Thai conversations is that a lot of emotion is added to the conversation by holding on to a letter(s), word or tone for an exaggeratedly long time.
Precisely. ไม่ใช่ (mai chai) 'No' and with a stretched chaaaai Not at all! Why would you think that! Or ครับ (khrab) meant as 'yes' stretched to khraaap it means something like 'yes, yes', 'good, yes' 'well we know'. สวยมเก (soeay make) soeaaay maaaak 'very beautiful'! We Dutch do it too, but the tone of 'heeel' also changes for us.
Congratulations and thank you for your efforts. Still, I have a complaint about your Thai lessons. 'chán rák theu ná' I really love you, it's only said like that by a woman. When a man says this to a woman it is: pom rak theu na.
Chan is always when the woman says something e.g. I say = chan phoot. Does a man do this is it: pom phoot.
Kind regards Martin
Dear Martin,
About the use of ฉัน chán, 'I', by men, I have often been in conflict with commenters. Men also use the word chán 'I' in intimate situations with their (bosom) friends (and also to children). It is then usually paired with 'theu' you. Just listen to soap operas and Thai songs. Phǒm creates a certain distance. If you say chán or phîe or your own name, it is warm and cozy. My son always says 'cow' 'me' to his friends, but you shouldn't use that as an adult, although that also happens when someone is angry or drunk.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=byldyBkR-eQ&list=PL36967C2195382156&index=15
Tino, do you know these language lessons? I sometimes go through them and coincidentally this one last night. These are free language lessons. The above is the 2nd part of a lesson and ties in with your excellent article.
Dear Ruud,
I took a look. Nice woman and she teaches nice. As I said there are many more such end words and she mentioned one that you often hear นะ เนี่ย na niea (high, falling tone). You use that when you know or saw something you didn't expect: เขา สวยนะเนี่ย 'She was very beautiful after niea!' you say surprised. "I didn't think she was so beautiful!"
Thank you, very instructive for us, we are going to live there in 2015 and are already learning the language.
Of course, we learn a lot from our friends during the three months a year we are there. Feel free to post some more of this… thanks!!! Hilde (44) and Ronny (46)
I have read the expressions with great attention and have also tried to pronounce them correctly. At the moment I don't have anyone to correct me because I'm currently in Spain, I'll have to wait until I get back to Thailand to try this out, luckily I have my sister-in-law who can correct me because I'm one of those retirees he always tries to make himself understood as best as possible in the language of the country I am in at that moment. I consider this a form of politeness towards the local population. I have to admit that this works better in Spanish or French than in Thai. And for all readers Sawadee
Thank you for your response. I assume you live in the Isan. This is because there are expressions that I know from the Isan area. There may be a problem with some pronunciations in Bangkok, because not everyone there speaks Isan. This is a common problem in Thailand. But which Limburger understands Frisian? We also know this problem in the Netherlands. Still, I think it's excellent that so much effort is being made to make the Thai language understandable. Continue like this. Thank you. Martin
I live in Chiang Mai and there they have the kham meuang dialect. What you see above is the Central Thai, the Common Civilized Thai. This language is so much related to Isan (more than Dutch and German) that much is simply the same.
Tino, my wife could communicate well with people from Chiang Mai and related provinces in the Netherlands. However, she sometimes had language problems with my sister-in-law. My sister-in-law is from Phuket and that is a completely different language. My wife comes/lives in NongKhai.
I myself have friends in Cha-am, whose wife is from central Thailand. She sometimes tries to improve my Thai because I speak too much Isaan dealect.
Only with my dog I have no language problem, because he speaks Dutch, English, Thai and LaoThai.
Tino,
Thanks for your contribution. You put many things that I more or less know or feel into perspective. Fortunately, I'm not yet 65 and I may still be interested in learning more Thai and because 65 won't last that long I apparently have to hurry.
A remarkable assumption that those living in Thailand over the age of 65 would no longer have any interest in the language. And then complain about those reluctant foreigners in the Netherlands. You would hope that Thailand would introduce integration courses. After all, language is what connects people.
Tino; thanks mate! Very instructive on this rainy Whit Monday. I can now “burn” my “educational services washington.dc” booklet, as Dick v/d Lugt would say. I am really happy with this; this information is clear and very instructive!
You just have to do more with this. Like: “Learn Thai fast with Tino”!
Only; since I have already been to several regions of Thailand, you also have the accents there as we have fries / twents and limburgs. I noticed that after 21 years in Thailand. The word: Doeay, I hardly ever use but they always understand me so far.
Tino; thanks again and the good explanation about trend (our 2nd language). Please more.
Regards: William.
I've been taking Thai lessons for a while, but it's all new to me what is shown here …… and therefore of course very important if you want to speak the Thai language fluently.
so thanks again;
greetings black jef
A very nice and good overview. Very useful, thank you.
There is a small mistake in the following sentence:
พูด ช้าๆ หน่อย ใด้ ไหม [Can you speak a little slower] Here the ('dai') is written with ใ, but it should be: ไค้
fri. regards Ronald
Ronald,
Quite right, thank you. I'm glad there are people who read along so well!
Tino,
Isn't "chék bin" a corruption of the English "Check the bill"?
Isn't it better to use “Kep Tang”?
That's both correct, Ronny. I also always say 'Kep tang doeay na khrab'. But you also hear 'chek bin' regularly.
Tino,
And then I saw something!
It says: ฉ้น รัก เธอ นะ 'chán rák theu ná' I really love you.
the “chan” has a tone sign, not a vowel (ั) as it should. (ฉัน)
Sincerely
Ronald
And then I noticed a mistake myself: ไคร นะ instead of the correct ใคร นะ ('Who?'). I have to go through those 20 words with a ใ (-ai-, mai moan) instead of a ไ (-ai-, mai ma laaj) again...... There is a song about it but I forgot it. That mistake is in ฉัน It's in the keyboard, I'm still not good at that. Another piece of Thai from my hand will be coming soon. I hold my breath. Checked it like 5 times…….
Yes, I saw that later too. More information
I'm definitely looking forward to more, it's really fun and useful.