Thailand: the glass half empty or half full
How nice or annoying is the life of a pensioner in Thailand? Is the glass half empty or half full? It all depends on how you look at it and especially how you experience it.
Half-empty, the aloof sourpuss
I'm done with Thailand! Land of smiles? In recent years, the Thais have become so grumpy, a smile or a friendly word is no longer possible. They are money wolves, every one of them. For example, a few weeks ago I thought I would have a nice beer in a bar and immediately all the girls jumped on me with bahtjes in their eyes. I sent them all but two away. It was a boring evening because those two girls hardly spoke a word of English. The bill was 4.000 baht! For 12 beers! I complained that I used to pay a lot less, but got no response. This is how they drive away their loyal customers, they won't see me again with such inhospitable practices!
And then that weird Thai language. I took 20 lessons and still can't talk to people. That language is much too difficult. Don't start. Why don't those Thais just learn proper English?
In the town here are three restaurants where they prepare Western food. I have to go there because Thai food gives me a stomach ache. But the food there is very expensive and nothing like real western food. Why don't those Thais ever learn anything? It's not that difficult is it?
With a bit of bad luck you will also be woken up by yodel from the village broadcaster. Then they have something to celebrate at the temple. Are those monks lazily collecting money, food and other donations. All day long that sound car, a lot of noise, howling people who make a mess of it. How do I get my rest?
Speaking of gang, our village is infested with trash. I once went to the village chief and said 'Village very dirty. Village no good! Why you do nothing?' He glared at me and walked away. At the slightest form of criticism, however justified, all those Thais immediately suffer loss of face. There is no improvement possible and it remains a third world country of course.
Last week I was pulled over at one of those useless checkpoints run by those brown service knockers. I was speeding they said. "Well yes, but 20 miles too fast!" I said indignantly. They wanted to see my driver's license and registration certificate, but I had forgotten to bring them. They wouldn't settle for copies and I had to pay a 2.000 baht fine which I reduced to 1.000 baht and which they put in their back pockets. What a corrupt gang.
At home also all that hassle with money, one after the other comes along to borrow money, but pay it back. Lend them a mere 500 baht and you'll never see it again. In fact, not much later they are again begging for money. All to pay their gambling debts. My stuff isn't safe either, no matter how many tools I lost in the beginning. They don't do returns, so I have to keep everything under lock and key. Fridge, drink? Same story, they just walk away with it. Like my house is a giveaway store. They really think the money is growing on my back.
I like to walk, but that's no fun here. Barking, biting dogs and a dirty, unhealthy air. I prefer to go high into the mountains with my SUV. But even then I smell burning fields, can't those lazy farmers stop? Don't they understand that there are much better methods for this that also benefit the new harvest? Really dumb dude.
The Thai are just really very different, their whole doing and thinking is nothing like ours. They really are from another planet. You can't be friends with them either. Thailand remains the center of the universe, they refuse to speak another language properly and those who get along with you always have something to do with you. You just remain an outsider.
Two days ago I was at the immigration office. What chaos! I had to hand in 5 additional documents, another completely unnecessary situation. I offered 1.000 baht but they wanted 2.000. The Netherlands is a corrupt country but Thailand is even worse. I walked away angry. Bullying a foreigner, that's how they slaughter the goose with the golden eggs! I keep it for this. I will return to the Netherlands in two weeks.
Half full, the compassionate enjoyer
Thailand is the most beautiful and friendliest country I've ever lived in. I enjoy the famous Thai smile daily. Yesterday I had a beer in a bar. There were so many ladies to choose from, I felt like a kid in a candy store, what a choice! I thought, go crazy and two beautiful, lovely ladies kept me company. We laughed a lot together at my crooked Thai! The bill of 4.000 baht was a bit pricey, but for such a great evening I was happy to pay for it. And in the bargain I got a free hug! Lucky guy that I am. Next week I'm going again, but a few beers less ladies!
It is very nice to learn the Thai language. It takes quite a bit of time but I'm willing to do that. I can now entertain the market women and bar girls with the same stupid Thai language jokes. They keep smiling happily! Khuay instead of kluay.
I often eat at the street stall around the corner. Tasty and very cheap. The manageress knows me well and recently she said 'Weer plaa chohn sadoeng?' That's my favorite dish. I said 'no my money is gone, just give me a bowl of rice.' She went to prepare the fish with a laugh.
Every now and then I wake up from the village radio. Then they announce, for example, a nice party where everyone is welcome. Everyone gets busy, people dance and make music. With simple means they make it a very nice day together. I am also always welcome at the parties. How many plates and glasses go through it, that involves a lot of rinsing. I like to help.
Unfortunately, our village is really dirty, with a lot of rubbish everywhere because there is no rubbish collection service. I went to talk to the village chief, I said I was concerned about the waste and pollution in our beautiful village. He listened to me and agreed that the village was not really clean. I suggested cleaning up the waste with a number of volunteers every other week. He was immediately enthusiastic and organized a group of five middle-aged and older women through the village broadcaster. Now we all go through the village every week to collect waste. Very nice with those smiling women and afterwards I always treat them to a simple meal. Really cozy!
So I regularly go out in the area. Stupid that I recently drove 20 kilometers too fast. I was arrested. Good thing there are so many checkpoints now. I apologized many times. Unfortunately, I had once again left my driver's license and registration certificate at home. Khon kae khie luum tae mai luum khie. "I'm an old forgetful man but never forget to poop." He found that very funny, but he rightly gave me a fine of 2.000 baht. I went to pay it the next day at the police station. 'Come again now!' said the lady behind the computer. Fortunately, the fines in Thailand are much cheaper than in the Netherlands, I would have lost 10.000 baht there!
People from the area also sometimes knock on the door to borrow money. For example for a new pair of shoes to go with the school uniform or for baby milk. Their daughter had left the child with them to work in Bangkok. Sad. Sometimes I give them something, sometimes I lend them some money. I don't keep track of all that, sometimes I get some money back, sometimes not. The neighbor also knows where to find my shed, which is not locked so sometimes I miss it. Gone tools, I walk to the house on the left or right and often I find my stuff there again. Oh, they are used again. I also sometimes treat the people from the neighborhood to a beer or something to eat. Some really don't have it wide, they won't quickly return a box of beer, but that doesn't matter either. When I go for a walk, they often invite me to use some fried rat meat or home-distilled whisky. With those sweet gestures and warmth they pay me back double and straight.
I like to take a detour, unfortunately the air around our village was once again very dirty due to the burning of the corn fields. I have had a chat with the farmers, who agree that it is not really appropriate, but they have little choice. They don't get help from the government to do it differently. Well, it's easy to talk from the sidelines if you don't have to turn every baht three times. I then got on my bike to go for a walk in a reasonably fresh forest after an hour.
Yes, I sometimes look strange, but when push comes to shove, the Thai are just people too. Some things are a bit different, but as with the Thai you have them in all shapes and sizes. There are also people who have become good acquaintances or friends. We have ordinary conversations about everyday and sometimes about special matters. We really feel each other and have a good time together. Recently one of them said 'I think you are half Thai in your heart'.
Unfortunately, not everything is sanoek and serious things also need to be sorted out. It was that time of year again: the walk to the immigration office. I was dreading it, it's always very busy. Sometimes I hate civil servants and official mills. This time there were only 5 documents too few, which I was allowed to deliver the next day. Fortunately, it went very quickly. Afterwards, at my wife's insistence, I wanted to give them a present of 500 baht, but they rejected that by appealing to their duty! Been off it for a year now. I hope to enjoy Thailand for many years to come!
(Thanks to Rob V. for helpful additions and corrections).
Tino,
Great idea and just like that…
a healthy 20
: )
Nicely written,
A positive and negative version with ~facts~
I also experience Thailand that way, but I experience it as the positive version, because I chose it myself!
That's just how it is Tino, it's just how you look at it or rather how you put it together. Are you easy going and not strict in the leather or are you, that saves a lot here in Thailand. I also disagree with a lot of what happens in Thailand, but I have to survive here, so mind at zero and a view of infinity is what I tell myself. The chameleon types do well here and the dinosaurs much less so I can also characterize it. Just as you write, we all experience recognizable situations during a long stay. I can wholeheartedly hope that there will be improvement in a number of areas, which is, whichever way you look at it, badly needed. Especially in the field of the degradation of society, safe driving, environment, education, education, etc. In my time this will no longer take place, so it will not happen soon. The Thai, but perhaps also humanity, is persistent in its shortcomings. Many do not want to learn but do what they please without considering the consequences. Tomorrow the sun will rise again for all of us and we will have new opportunities to exploit. I am far from done learning and hopefully many with me, then the future can improve a bit. 2020 we will experience it in life and well-being.
That is a wonderful attitude Tino … in the beginning I was like the first, but after a few years and especially avoiding contact with sour expats, it is still so beautiful and pleasant in Thailand. Have left the country after 14 years (2002-2016) but hope to move back soon.
Nice piece.
In my opinion the glass should always be half full, but I sometimes get the feeling that the writer and his editor see the life of a Thai as half empty.
I have 0,0 voting rights in Thailand, almost my input that I have in Dutch and EU politics. In the Netherlands, among other things, I do not have a direct vote when choosing a mayor or a senator.
Despite this detail, the glass is half full for me, because you really have to walk very much and especially visibly outside the lines if you want to have a problem.
As long as you don't act crazier than your local police boss, it's not too bad.
With the current state of democracy and the democratic thinking of (elected) politicians, having or not having the right to vote is less and less connected with the exercise of influence. Parliamentary democracy is an outdated and outdated concept.
I dare say that as a foreigner I have much more influence on Thai politics than all the votes of my Thai colleagues put together. And see: if they want to exert their influence, they do not use the ballot paper, but their networks. I also do that. And that works.
King, Colonel and Cardinal
Along with capital
Let's all help each other
Just kidding. Perhaps you can use your influence to make humor and irony about high-ranking people no longer punishable? Thank you.
Thailand: a laugh and a tear!
Haha. Nice story Tony. Finally another entertaining article on Thailandblog. I laughed my ass off Tino. Both types are very well worded and also very recognizable. It's what you make of it in Thailand and how you look at things. I'm more of the half full type. Unfortunately, I increasingly come across the half-empty type in Thailand. I often see them early in the morning. They are already sitting on the complaining bench at 10.00:1 am with a beer in hand. I always avoid it with a wide berth And then I do indeed have only XNUMX piece of advice: then you should go back to the Netherlands. Not that it'll matter though. Because type half empty will also soon complain about how bad it all is in the Netherlands. That's the nature of the half-empty type. They just always have to have something to complain about otherwise they are not “happy”.
Yes Tino, it just depends on how you look at it. For example, I am positive towards you and I admire you for your active mind and relentless fight against perceived injustice while chris, the teacher in Bangkok, reported to you yesterday (28/12) in one of his reactions to fake news that you would suffer from a notorious authority syndrome. Now I am not medically trained, but I do remember that a syndrome actually represents a disease and that is not positive anyway. Concerned for your well-being, I therefore searched the Internet for it but found nothing. Could the university lecturer have just thrown this syndrome up his sleeve? Incidentally, I am glad that Rob V. was able to be of service to you with the necessary additions. Since Chris was also wondering if he was feeling well yesterday and assumed he was suffering from a virus, I was a little concerned about him as well. After all, a lecturer is not the first person to come and he will not go ice cream overnight when establishing a diagnosis, I thought. Well, let me raise a (full) glass to it.
Dear Leo Th.,
People who are only negative (always see a glass as half full) or who always oppose something without any nuance, not only have a difficult life, but according to research, they also live shorter lives. I don't wish that on either Tino or RobV. Hence my attempt to get them to some nuance and moderation.
In my own social circle I know several army officers who are the absolute opposite of what both writers would have us believe, namely that THE whole army is against the population or against those parts that are 'red'. These officers help people during floods, droughts, other disasters, protect foreign dignitaries, protect historical buildings and assist Thais and foreign nationals who are at risk of becoming victims of corruption or other injustice. And refuse to cooperate in forms of criminal or unethical conduct.
Of course I know that there are also die-hards in the army who don't care about everything. But that's not everyone in the military.
As far as I'm concerned, the glass is almost filled to the brim… No, nothing is perfect, not even Thailand.
An excellent story from the thick of the thumb, Tino, to reflect the feelings of black and rose-glasses.
'It' Thailand does not exist; we all experience the country in our own way and then tell us in this blog, or elsewhere, how we liked it and then we can talk about it. Or complain….
After 26 years of Thailand, I am still working on a glass half full, even though I have gone from resident to 4+8. And the terrible injustice that prevails in Thailand increasingly appears to be an Asian disease
with a Chinese as source. I keep my eyes open to that, knowing that I can't change that.
Erik,
My first visit to Thailand was in 1980 and then again about 40-50 times.
Hua hin had 1 restaurant where you could eat something western.
In the last 20 years, tourism has increased enormously and Thailand has changed considerably and therefore also the mentality,
The nice places are still there, but you have to look hard.
I'm clearly on the side of the half empty glass, but that's mostly because of my wife's family.
Actually, I'm already tired of it in Thailand.
My wife also complains about the Thai mentality.
No pension status in Thailand for me and my wife, despite the fact that we have a nice new house there.
We keep it on a holiday visit, as far as I am concerned, it can also take place in another warm country.
I came to live in Thailand years ago for 3 main reasons.
The people were super friendly.
There was a super relaxed atmosphere.
It was a super cheap country.
Of those reasons, almost nothing remains.
Thais have become very arrogant. They are only 'friendly' if there is still a lot to be earned from you. If there is nothing to earn, I find Westerners even friendlier.
If you enter into a discussion, you will quickly get on your toes. Arguing is totally discouraged. Before you know it you are in serious trouble.
The relaxed atmosphere has become a rather worked-up atmosphere where only the color of the money is important.
Thailand has become more expensive than Europe for many things. We used to bring a suitcase full of stuff from Thailand to Europe, today it has become the other way around.
The Thailand of today has absolutely nothing to do with the Thailand of yesteryear. In 25 years it has evolved from a paradise to an economic money grab.
I don't know where you live or come from in Thailand. But I have been coming there for 24 years and I do see changes, but I also see them in the Netherlands and also in other countries. 24 years ago I thought it was a lot more pleasant than now in the Netherlands. The Netherlands has become a lot grimmer. I think it's a global problem because people have lost their way of who they really are. But where I go in Thailand, the Thai are still as friendly as they were 24 years ago. I am always approached with a genuine smile and no they are not after my money. In fact, when my bank card no longer worked, I first approached some foreign “friends” if I could borrow some money before my new bank card would be here. They all dropped me hard. Of course they are no longer friends. Nota bene, a rather poor Thai woman lent me 10000 baht to get by for 1 week in the full confidence that she would get it back. Fortunately, my new bank card arrived at its destination within 4 days. Of course we then celebrated a party with that woman. I took her whole family out to dinner in return for the trust she had in me. and it was still very late that day before everyone went to bed. Because it was very nice. All in all, it cost me 1100 baht. After that, the bond with the family has only become closer. And so I can tell even more positive stories about my relationship with the Thai. I myself have hardly ever had any problems with the Thai people. I still find the people friendly. There is still a relaxed atmosphere. And I still think it's cheap. But I don't often go to the overcrowded tourist parts of Thailand. Maybe that makes the difference. Or maybe I'm a glass half full type. You seem like a glass half empty type.
Dear Hans,
I personally experienced almost the same story, 5 years ago. A 'friend''s bank card had also expired and could no longer transfer money. He asked for help, which I, as a compatriot, gave him in full confidence. It was about 20.000THB, he could continue with that until he got his new bank card. We are now 5 years later and, yes, I haven't seen a penny again… here too bay bay friend….as you can see, a glass is half full or half empty, depending on the experience. Still I keep thinking positively, but certain things will no longer be possible.
I'm sorry Uncle Addie that you went through this. I myself once lent 5000 baht to a wildly strange Canadian. I was sitting in a bar and heard someone panicking outside. Turns out his bank card had been eaten by the ATM. Didn't get out. Was Friday night. Called the bank but they could only come and look on Monday due to holidays. He was on vacation for a few days and lived 200 km away. Petrol was almost gone, had to pay hotel for 2 more nights and of course food until Monday. He didn't ask me for money. He seemed like a nice guy and I offered to lend him 5000 baht. He looked at me unbelievably and said do you really want to do that for me, you don't even know me. I have faith in you to bring it back Monday night. Monday night he came to the bar and gave me the money back. We then went out with the two of us and he paid for all the drinks for me in return. I am still in contact with him after 8 years. Sometimes it works out well. But I should also add that I have also lent money to Thai people. It was not about shocking amounts of a few thousand baht. Of the 6x I have had the money back 2x and also after much insistence. So I don't lend to Thai anymore unless I've known them for a long time. But I also remain positive about Thailand.
“Being able to communicate with people is an absolute prerequisite for being accepted in a society.”
That is completely true, but that does not imply that you have mastered the local language completely. At the university in the Netherlands I had colleagues from Cameroon, Jamaica, Turkey, Germany, Austria, South Africa, Indonesia and the USA. None of them spoke, read or wrote Dutch (or Frisian). And they were accepted as full members of the staff and also citizens in Leeuwarden.
Still forgotten:
there are some very good translation apps on the market that translate real-time to Thai. Also from Dutch:https://www.digitaltrends.com/mobile/best-translation-apps/.
So communication is not so much speaking the local language, not even speaking a common language, but respect and empathy from both sides.
I wrote COMMUNICATE REASONABLY.
I also don't have a university degree in Thai, but I can talk to anyone in the village as long as it's about general things.
You shouldn't come to me with names of car parts or anything like that.
Even that might have been possible if I had a car, but the occasional taxi into town is easier and cheaper.
Moreover, you can not make accidents yourself, which is so nice, at most the taxi driver.
Beautifully described how the same situation can be experienced completely differently.
With a (half) full glass I toast to the new year and wish everyone a beautiful, loving but above all healthy 2020!
It's funny that most people see themselves as positive and some others see themselves as more whiny/sour-hearted. Of course, it is easy to judge someone else when they complain or wave that dreaded finger. Or even worse, take the man who stood in the center of Bangkok earlier this month waving not 1 but 3 fingers. 555
Don't judge someone else too quickly, putting yourself in someone else's shoes is damn difficult. It is very easy to accuse someone else of focusing on the negative and to pat yourself on the back: "Look, I'm enjoying it here, look at me doing well." While the grumbler can also see himself as having a very positive outlook on life. I also see my own glass as half full, although I do not keep my mouth shut when I see abuses or things that could and should be improved. There are those who prefer to keep their mouths shut, some out of fear, some because looking away is nice (as long as I get it right) or for other reasons. In any case, don't put someone else in a box too quickly, especially if you don't know the other person from real life. Some of the commenters here that make me think 'hey, what a…' may actually be very nice people who contribute in their own way to make it all a bit more pleasant and cheerful. So I have to put those thoughts back in my box or let them go. So whether you meet sour people in real life and online or not, don't let that spoil your own smile. Be positive and share that - with gestures, no matter how small or large - with others. 🙂
Laura Hansen could just be a friend of yours. Sentence served and therefore a clean slate.
There are also people who think “once a genocide supporter, always a genocide supporter”
Opinions will always be there as well as the reality of the day and self interest.
A good 2020 and especially in good health.
Wonderful post, Tina. Read something about the police but nothing about the army, not half empty or half full. (wink)
Why don't you return to your country if you are so dissatisfied. And one more thing, you don't have to say that they can't do anything in Thailand. They should not adapt to you, but you should adapt to the people in Thailand.
Nicely sketched, Tino! As a lifelong optimist and avid cyclist, I believe that acidification is something for the legs, but not for the mind. See https://www.thailandblog.nl/leven-thailand/hoe-staat-het-met-uw-verzuring/
Nice story Hans, I am in Thailand for 3 months to visit family and travel around. Still the land of smiles for me, so I don't understand why you're in such a situation. What kind of place have you been in where you pay 333 bht per beer?? And do you know what is corrupt? In the Netherlands, driving 20 km too fast and receiving a fine of more than 150 euros. If you had had your driver's license with you, you would have lost between 200 and 400 bht, so it's a joke
Dear Tino, of course I agree with you that it matters a lot how you look at life, especially in Thailand. For many elderly people, who are not so flexible anymore, life here is not really pleasant. But I hope that your humorous story will change that.
But how realistic are your examples really? Are they typically Thai? For example, in 43 years I myself may have experienced 1 (one) time that a woman imposed herself. Not at all now that I'm married, not even when I cross Thailand and some surrounding countries 1* per year with a friend (so without a wife) for a week. So I never see high bar bills. I am not bothered by the village broadcaster or other noise nuisance, but that may also be because I live hundreds of meters from the village. And rubbish in the area? That is not too bad, but we have had a garbage collection service for years. A fine from the police? Never, and neither does my wife. Borrow money? Yes, occasionally, but usually I get it back without asking. Remove drinks from my fridge? They often bring more booze than is consumed, and I still live in the poor part of Thailand. Biting dogs? I have cycled many hundreds of kilometers but have never been bitten and I really don't have a stick or anything with me. And the air quality? No problem where I live either. And with “immigration” I usually get my extension without having to collect additional documents.
I don't need a half-full philosophy to see it sunny here. And I never have to put on my rose colored glasses. I'm only bothered by snakes, but you can't kill them. At least some farangs think so.
I think it depends on the seriousness of situations experienced whether one is seen as a person where the glass is half full or half empty.
When my computer keyboard suddenly disappears and is used 3 houses away, the refrigerator is looted, my beer is drunk, my slippers disappear and people keep asking for money, I will belong to the half-full category.
Much is shared in Thailand
When my car is taken without permission, by someone without a driver's license and with half a bottle of whiskey behind his teeth, I really belong to the half-empty category.
Also when the family goes to buy things without my knowledge, with the announcement Farang paid.
My opinion is that it depends on the environment / family whether a person sees things half full or half empty and less on the person himself.
Delicious, enjoyed