You experience everything in Thailand (68)

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Every foreigner, who falls in love with a Thai beauty, has to deal with it at some point. At least, if the love is mutual and the relationship develops into a more or less serious relationship. When the lady starts talking about a visit to her village in Isaan to introduce the good man to the parents, you have to be careful. An important event for her, something for him to be amazed again about Isan life.

Blog administrator Peter had that happen to him quite a few years ago and wrote a story about it, which fits nicely into our series.

A bucket for the monk

During the second day of my visit to a Thai village in Isaan, I was allowed to visit the local monk. The group that went to the monk consisted of a Thai beauty, her parents and a group of children. All this followed by a farang, who has no idea what is going to happen.

That's also the nice thing about Thailand, you never know what's going to happen and nobody will bother to explain it to you. So it is a surprise every time.

The monk lives a stone's throw away. So a neighborhood monk. Such a hairless monk wrapped in cloth always looks impressive. You automatically respect him. The monk's charisma radiates from it miles away. A monk always maintains his dignity, even if he is just curious and asks where that long pale farang comes from. Not that I understood his question. But in my friend's response I heard something like “Ollan-t”. Now you can't make soup from the Thai language, in Isaan they also speak Lao or even Khmer. They also have their own language, which for convenience I call Isan.

To laugh hard

The monk nods as if approving that I am from “Ollan-t”. I don't expect him to have learned where "Ollan-t" is in the monks' school. Because Thai people think that Thailand is the center of the world anyway. But a monk knows everything. He is closer to Buddha than we simple souls.

The monk sits on a dais like an Emperor on his throne. Sitting cross-legged. If I forget about the wooden deck, it floats a little above the ground. I am always slightly tense at such important events. Afraid I'll mess up. That I do something terribly wrong and the family has to move to another village out of shame. Fortunately, Thais are patient and you, as a clumsy farang, have a lot of credit. If you make a mistake, Thais will laugh loudly. Not to laugh at you, but to give you the opportunity to get out of a predicament. You do this by laughing along loudly. The Thais solve everything with laughter or with money (money has a slight preference).

Impolite

I have learned a few important rules of the game by heart. You should never point your feet at a monk. That is very rude. Showing a monk proudly that you just had your shoes resoled at 'Van Haren' is therefore rather inconvenient.

I keep a close eye on my girlfriend just to be sure. As long as I do a little bit of the same as her, it should work. The shoes have to be taken off and we settle down on the mat in front of the dais where the monk is sitting. The feet back, of course. It can begin. First the monk receives an envelope with contents. Like everywhere, clerics are mad about money. With that money they can help others, like themselves. After all, a monk is only human.

Brown bucket

The old monk also gets a bucket. A bucket with contents. And that fascinates me so much that it is even the source of inspiration for this article. You can buy those special monk buckets with contents at the local HEMA. The bucket contains everyday items such as instant coffee, tea, noodles and incense sticks. Things that a monk desperately needs for the simple monk's life. The brown buckets are the cheapest, and therefore also the most popular to give away. Although I wonder what a monk does with so many brown buckets.

Then it really starts. The monk starts to talk. It's more preaching, sometimes it looks like lamentation. Perhaps about his hard monastic life. They don't have it easy those monks. Of course they are still guys who sometimes want to put the flowers outside. And the flesh is weak.

It could also be that he mutters about something completely different in monastic language. That he hates getting another brown bucket. That he would have preferred a blue one, with such a handy lid. At least you can put ice cubes in there.

The children who are also on the mat are bored. They move continuously. With the feet towards the monk. Mom frantically tries to fold the children's legs back. It does not work. But it doesn't matter, they're children. I regularly fold my hands in a Wai. Sometimes I have to put them on the ground in front of me and bow my head to the ground. I do everything well. Who knows, it might help in some way. The monk also throws water. It seems like the Catholic Church.

Thai blessing

At the end of the ceremony, the monk addresses especially my girlfriend and my person. He will wish us good luck and prosperity. My girlfriend echoes the monk and encourages me to join in. Now my Thai is a bit limited. “Aroi Mak Mak”, doesn't seem appropriate now. But Khap Khun Khap must be possible, I thought in all my simplicity. So I enthusiastically shout: “Khap Khun Khap!” Everyone starts laughing. “No, no”, says my girlfriend to make it clear that I better not say anything. It is not easy such a Thai blessing.

The monk has finally finished his prayer and will now discreetly withdraw to see how much money is in the envelope.

I walk home again with my enlightened mind, an experience richer and a bucket poorer.