Dear readers,

My friend from Belgium got a Thai pregnant in Thailand. A child has now been born but he refuses to send alimony money.
It is now said that there could be problems if he returns to Thailand.

Knowing the woman, she will file a complaint with the police and immigration.

Are such situations known?

Thank you for your answer.

Yours faithfully,


28 Responses to “Reader Question: My Friend Got a Thai Woman Pregnant in Thailand”

  1. rik says up

    Moderator: no moralizing remarks, please only a response to the reader's question.

  2. sven says up

    Moderator: no moralizing remarks, please only a response to the reader's question.

  3. eduard says up

    Hello, my friend has experienced the same. Never had any problems, waited a year and first had a DNA test done. Child was his, but did not want to know anything about it. Family was rebellious, but if he does not pay, there is no point to do. Nevertheless, he voluntarily gave a sum of money when the child was 2 years old and was never heard from again.

  4. Oean Eng says up

    I can't imagine there could be any official problems. There are a lot of single mothers whose father cheated and then raised the children alone. But the unofficial problems… they can add up, I think. Besides….you did the crime…so now you have to do the time…
    I had a girl who later claimed she was pregnant and had a child from me..blatant lie...

  5. Keith 2 says up

    Not immediately, but in the long term this can certainly cause problems: he can be taken to court and be obliged to pay a monthly contribution. If he does not pay, the property may be confiscated and auctioned. Even eventually possessions in Belgium, if his ex-girlfriend plays it hard.

    See, where you can read:
    “When a child is born out of marriage, the biological father of the child is not bound by law to pay for the financial support unless the legitimacy of the child in Thailand issue is brought to the court; then the court will decide such issues concerning legitimacy, child custody, and child support in the same case.”

    The cheapest solution seems to me to negotiate and see if he can get away with 10.000 baht a month. Who knows, he can also pay for legal (+ lawyer) costs…

    • Rob V says up

      Indeed, that's the same as what I saw on TV this week in the Ask the Lawyer forum:

      “Thai girl pregnant, what are my obligations?
      You have no obligations towards this pregnancy. After the child is born, however, she can apply to the court for a decision on paternity. If you are deemed to be the father then the court will set maintenance.”


      Intuitively I would say: if you stick your magic wand in something, you also have to bear the consequences. If there is reason to doubt that the child is his then I would definitely do a DNA test. And jointly reach a decent deal out of court. If he doesn't feel like it all, then it remains to be seen whether her family will go to court to enforce it.

    • ruud says up

      “When a child is born out of marriage”

      That means a child within a marriage.
      That is unlikely here.

      • angelic says up

        *…born OUT of marriage* means born *out of* marriage. So it does apply in this specific case. This just for information @ruud

        • Gringo says up

          Sorry Angelique, that is not correct!
          A child born out of a legal marriage is “born out of wedlock”: not “out of marriage”

  6. Didit says up

    If this is indeed his child, possibly to be proven by means of a DNA test, and he indeed does not wish to pay maintenance money, he would indeed, given the risks, choose a different holiday destination.

  7. Rob says up

    Hello Pattie,

    Interesting issue as my girlfriend has a child from a previous relationship and he is also doing nothing to help with the expenses for the little one.
    He does have the guts to contact her now and then (once a year), to visit her in the village, to see his daughter.
    Using her car and motorcycle too, without compensating her in the slightest.
    Kept myself in the background on this matter, but she has decided on her own that he is no longer welcome and wants no more contact.

    I doubt whether there is an obligation to send "maintenance money" for the small one.
    If she wants to make a case of it, she will have to prove (DNA) that the child is his.
    Unless he himself has already “accepted” the child after birth.
    So I suspect it won't go that fast and he certainly won't be stopped at the airport on a subsequent visit.

    However, your friend may have a problem if he is seen by her during his next visit to the country. Revenge and jealousy feelings can then come up in her.

    So I will leave my moralistic opinion behind.
    It can be seen from several sides. Both of course should have been more careful.
    It is not known whether it was an accident or whether contraceptives were deliberately used.
    The question to what extent you should take your responsibility then is up to him.

    Greetings, Rob.

  8. support says up


    I would advise your friend not to go to Thailand for the time being. I find it strange to read that on the one hand he apparently admits to have made a Thai woman pregnant, but on the other hand does not want to take the consequences. And you call him your friend?

    However, if he is of the opinion that he is not the father of the child, then he will simply have a DNA test carried out? That brings clarity to everyone. I think for you too. Because if he runs away from his responsibility once, I think he will do it more often.

    • BA says up

      Kind of easy to judge based on a story with a few sentences.

      Personally, I think that the lady comes quite late with it when the child is already born.

      If she had reported it while she was just pregnant, they could also have considered other things, such as abortion, etc. That friend was not asked at all what he thinks of children until the child was born, and whether he is at all prepared to to ensure. (apart from the question of whether it is even his…)

      Apparently she wanted to keep it herself and is now trying to enforce maintenance money.

      I experienced a similar case with a lady with whom I had a relationship for some time. We were both aware that there was no permanent relationship and that it was only for a short period of time. She already had children from a previous marriage and her last had given birth via caesarean section. She firmly claimed that she couldn't get pregnant after that, if you saw the scars, that was pretty credible too. Guess what happened, 1 time without contraceptives and immediately hit the bull's eye, so she could still get pregnant. Talked about it, of course, and that became the abortion ward. Indicated that I wanted to help her with that, but if she tells me that she cannot get pregnant, does get pregnant, and still wants to keep it, then supporting a child is not my responsibility.

      Moral of this story. It's not just the friend who takes on his responsibilities. But the lady herself is also responsible for her actions. Morning after pill you can get on every street corner at every pharmacy in Thailand and costs 60 baht. And a normal pill as we know it is also available for not too much money. Many ladies even prefer to use the morning after pill as the daily pill because they find it more convenient. And the ladies are usually really not ignorant in that area.

      So if she brings it up again while the child has already been born, you can question whether that falls under the responsibilities of that friend.

  9. wibart says up

    Well, the obvious questions first. Is there evidence that your boyfriend is the father? Is there proof that the child is hers? It can also be yet another scam to steal money from the pockets of the “rich” farang. I assume it was a short-lived relationship? Not much can be deduced from your post from these questions. In general, I would say that the threats don't usually go that fast. The step to actually file a complaint with the Thai police and immigration often means a great loss of face for the Thai. However, a small moralization is in order is your friend the father? ; then I also think that he should take his responsibility and contribute to the maintenance of, after all, his child.

  10. Marcel says up

    The first question is and remains, of course, whether the child is really his, or whether this Thai beauty is simply 'trying to make a profit'. Although he thinks he is the fertilizer, the question is whether this is the case.
    The truth will first have to be revealed with DNA or the like.
    Good luck !!

  11. Aad says up

    Dear Pattie,
    He can expect the same problems as elsewhere in the world. But he may be able to buy it off and make a settlement with the family. I would not recommend doing that yourself in Thailand, but to hire a lawyer in Thailand.
    And how does he know the baby is his? In any case, have a DNA test performed by the lawyer because it is of course the oldest trick in the world.
    In Thailand, that is probably the most common way to catch a Farang.


  12. Keith 2 says up

    So in summary, it's a civil matter and as long as there's no court ruling, police/immigration can't do anything, it seems to me.

  13. he says up

    No moralizing remarks on my part, for the same money the boy has been set up and he is not to blame.

    Don't believe there will be problems. I know myself, and through various women who have been made pregnant by their Thai boyfriend and are then on their own. I don't think they've ever heard of alimony. In addition, if the Thai wants something, she will first have to prove that the child is your friend's and then start a procedure to get some money. Only after this is granted does he start to have obligations but I don't think it will come to that.

  14. riekie says up

    I think if he has not legally recognized the child that it is his child there is little she can do..
    If there is no birth certificate with him as the father, there is no proof that he is the father.
    Maybe he could get into trouble with her family so if he's sensible he won't come back.

  15. HansNL says up

    In the first place, there must be evidence that Vriendenmans is indeed the natural father.
    Secondly, collection of maintenance costs is only possible in the country where Daddy lives.
    And now it comes, this collection agency can never transfer the collected directly to the mother, but only to a distribution office of the government in the country of residence of mother and child.
    This agency can then arrange payment to the mother.
    Thailand does not have such an agency.

    So end of story.

    If the alleged daddy is sued by the mother through the court, paternity will have to be proven.
    And there, Daddy can be sued in a civil suit.

    Getting a woman pregnant is a civil matter, not a criminal one.

    I make no judgment about the father or the mother.
    Proof of paternity is a legal matter.
    Until then, nothing is wrong.

    But, TIT.

    If paternity is proven, he must pay.

    However, after returning to one's own country, see above, payment cannot be enforced in any way.

  16. Gringo says up

    The mother can only demand financial support from the father if she is married to the father under Thai law.

    Even if your boyfriend acknowledges, either verbally or through a DNA test, that he is the biological father, there is no Thai law from which the mother can make financial demands.

    Another thing, of course, is the moral duty: well the pleasures, then also the burdens, if he is a fellow!

    • hun Roland says up

      Moderator: Please do not chat.

  17. Keith 2 says up

    My first comment didn't get through:
    Info here:

    If the lady goes to court and the judge decides that your friend has to pay, it can be enforced.

  18. HansNL says up

    One of the responders believes that an amount of 10000 baht is fine.

    Too much.

    In most cases, the court awards a standard amount.
    And that amount does NOT depend on the father's income.
    Think 2500 baht or something.

    But only if paternity is proven.
    A name on the birth certificate is arguable proof.

    The man can be summoned to court by the mother upon his return to Thailand.
    Doesn't she know he's in Thailand, nothing happens.
    Stay away from the woman.

  19. l.low size says up

    Moderator: Only a response to the reader's question please.

  20. ton says up

    Make sure when you go for a DNA test that you do it in a neutral city or take the test home with you.
    Don't think that Thai lady will go to a lawyer, she will probably already be busy pranking another guy.
    But yes, do think that it is advisable to stay away from the lady, especially when they are drinking with other ladies.
    So check where she is and don't go there.

  21. Arnoldss says up

    I have the exact same thing with my ex. experienced . On the assumption that it was my child, I sent money every month for a year. I had DNA performed in Bangkok police hospital, despite the accusations of her family and staff that I did not want to take care of the child.
    After 3 weeks the results came, the child was not mine.
    She had given a false name both in the hospital and at the city hall, according to the Thai
    Law punishable.

    Gr, Arnoldss

  22. chrisje says up

    let one thing be clear They don't know alimony here in Thailand.
    Many Thai marriages have failed and the man (husband) has disappeared with the northern sun
    And that's where it ends

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