Dear readers,
My twin brother passed away in Thailand on May 28, 2017 due to a tragic accident. My brother was terminally ill. He suffered from Huntington's disease.
In the evening of May 27, my brother left his home (after an argument). He was later found badly injured outside the house (in the rain) by his wife. She had gone looking for him by car (according to her). Wound on the back of his head. Had fallen, according to his wife. Was unable to speak. After being found, he was taken to the hospital in Phitsanulok by his wife.
Later, my brother was taken from the hospital to his home (Bang Rakam), where he passed away after 20 minutes (early morning May 28). Until the day of the cremation (May 31), no police had been involved in the death. In the morning of May 31, I called the Dutch embassy in Bangkok. The embassy called for the police. The cremation has been postponed. The cremation was allowed to continue after an hour.
At the moment I have 1001 questions (going to Thailand in August). Couldn't attend the cremation as I have severe COPD. I need doctor's certificates and oxygen to travel.
I don't trust many things. However, the Ministry of Foreign Affairs does not get much further at the moment. What to do?
Yours faithfully,
John Hofstra
Dear,
Condolences on the loss of your brother. Your brother meant a lot to you, and that will certainly make the grieving process more intense and emotional. Let yourself be assisted by a confidential counselor who will help you get through that period. This will make it easier for you to decide which steps you want to take to address the circumstances of your brother's death.
With regards,
BETTER SLEEP
Dear Jan, my condolences on the loss of your twin brother. Huntington's is a nasty disease. A disease that also affects the personality. I can imagine that this can be a source of conflict in a relationship. Your account suggests that you believe that the circumstances surrounding your brother's death are not what the wife reports. The fact is that you should nevertheless assume that, now that the Embassy has also been able to postpone the cremation, however: the police have not “established” any other facts. (Which was also not to be expected) Now that your brother has been cremated, the cause of death has been determined and it is a fait accompli. If you want to investigate whether there should be any doubts about this, I advise you to be careful. You do not write that you know the wife, nor her family, nor are you aware of the living and relationship situations of your late brother.
Of course it is good, also for your processing, to visit the wife in order to inform you of how your brother has fared during his life in Thailand. It is also good to visit the temple where he was cremated or the place where the urn is kept or to make a donation to the temple. But do all this in the context of your farewell to your brother and because of your grieving process.
However, if you want the seam of the stocking, and you come to Thailand suspiciously, and especially if you don't know Thailand (!), then I don't advise you to go there on your own. Get a solid Thai confidant, eg through a bona fide law firm who can help you guide, translate and understand the situation. Also realize that you need to have a plan B in case your suspicions turn out to be true. Because what do you want with those suspicions? The wife will stick to her story, the police have closed the investigation, your brother has now been released from all earthly hassles, and you return home with even more questions and resentment than you already have. In short: do not choose your brother - he is no more, but choose yourself and say goodbye with dignity. Then you can continue. Good luck!
You wrote that beautifully Ruud and that will certainly all be discussed if Jan were to actually travel to Thailand to do research and say goodbye. Jan's brother has been in hospital and the police will have made inquiries there. An investigation into the home where he died would also have been conducted. But cremation was postponed for an hour for both investigations. That is very short-sighted. It is also now no longer possible to perform an autopsy to determine the cause of death. Did family know that Jan's brother would be cremated in Thailand? I can imagine Jan's dissatisfaction. I also wish Jan and family strength in dealing with their family member and for the time being also the Thai branch, because it is of course possible that it was an accident that led to his death.
First condolences on the death.
We'll never know what happened.
But consider this: If the woman had hit him on the head, she would not have taken him to the hospital alive, but would have waited until he died.
For he could tell alive that she had beaten him.
What happened on the street will never be known.
But it seems likely to me that if the doctor had suspected that a crime had been committed, he would have called for the police.
Condolences to your brother.
I wouldn't look into it any further, you won't get an answer anyway. We experienced it years ago.
Man dies in a strange way... there were cameras there. Images are not available! Reported to the Dutch embassy, which was unable to do anything about this. Head injured, conclusion died of diabetes. This was not possible because the gentleman was under 2 monthly checks from the hospital in NL.
As a farang you stand with your back against the wall
If you still want to go to Thailand, do it for yourself, it costs you a lot of energy.
Good luck in whatever you decide