Wan di, wan mai di (part 19)

The end of September is marked every year by a new page in my book 'Experiences with the Thai bureaucracy'. 

Or maybe a little different. You never know if the new prime minister's pervasive message of better (read: less corrupt) service will be heard and perhaps even understood in the offices dealing with foreigners in Thailand.

Why end of September? Well: my work permit runs from October 1 to September 30 and my visa is linked to my work permit and therefore expires on the same day. Usually the lady from Human Resources of my institute comes to tell me at the end of the month that I can sign my new contract, after which she needs a few days to make all kinds of letters and copies.

First the papers

This year it was a little different. Coincidentally, on September 19, my 90-day reporting period expired. In order not to have to travel twice to the immigration office at Chaeng Wattana, I had asked Human Resources if it was possible that I could also have my visa extended on September 19th. That would mean that I should also have access to my new employment contract on that day.

Well, that was possible because the director had already decided that my contract would be extended for one year. No longer is allowed for foreigners who work for the government. Only the percentage of the salary increase still had to be determined on the basis of the data I supplied on the number of teaching hours and the number of scientific publications so that my KPI score (key performance indicator) could be calculated.

Everything was ready on time and I hadn't even forgotten to go to a doctor beforehand for a doctor's certificate that I was as healthy as a fish. This attractive female doctor was able to determine this by looking deep into my eyes and then measuring my blood pressure. Very effective and innovative, and it only cost 80 baht.

The visitors

On this annual trip to the Thai bureaucracy, I always like to take my wife with me. That has two reasons. The first few years when I didn't and didn't come home until dinner, she didn't want to believe my stories that it all took so long. She may have thought I had spent a few hours in the pub, but I never smelled of alcohol or other women.

The second reason is that my wife knows quite a few bigwigs in this country through her work as a manager of a large contracting company. So if things don't go smoothly with the papers or the civil servant insists on his / her stripes, she is not afraid to intervene (by telephone, of course). If it's not necessary, it won't happen.

And without the power words, she can now see and experience exactly how things work (in a rather inefficient way). For example, she can sometimes give examples to the top executives from the field that things don't go so smoothly if they constantly talk (or hear from subordinates) because criticism is of course anything but fun.

September 19th was a Friday and more importantly, not really towards the end of the month so the traffic on 'Immigration' might not be too bad. Hope brings life. And indeed. The journey by taxi was virtually traffic-free and so we were in the office when the doors opened at exactly 08.30:21. Through the unavoidable queue I was assigned number XNUMX. Now on to the counters. Some foreigners were already waiting but the desks were all empty.

The first officials appeared at 08.45:5 am, the well-known Thai quarter. A lady first started cleaning her desk and placing a few new dolls on top of her screen. The others first had to discuss the episode of the Thai soap from the night before. Result: until about 9 minutes past XNUMX, nothing happened.

That is not entirely true. On the side of the large room it was a bustle of activity. A number of officials surrounded a male person. The man looked familiar to me from television, but I had to think carefully where I had seen him. It was the Korean taekwondo coach who was discredited not long ago for beating a Thai pupil who had won a gold medal at the last Olympic Games. Apparently he got up even earlier than me or he got preferential treatment. The latter, I think. Of course every official had to take a picture with him. That's why the desks remained empty.

New

But there was something more going on there. I noticed that when the sequence numbers 21 to 30 were asked. I was there. I reported and was immediately led to a desk where a nice lady asked me to take a seat. I handed over my tracking number and then my papers to get an extension of my visa.

She looked at everything and then asked my wife to make a copy of two pages in my passport. I'm sure I had all the copies with me that are listed on the website, but it makes little sense - I know - to report this to the lady in question. So my wife disappeared on the way to the copy shop.

I was allowed to sit at the desk and the official actually started a conversation with me. When my wife returned, the official stamped my passport and asked us to move to the next desk. Here the 1900 baht had to be paid. Then to a third office where another official went over the whole process again and came to the conclusion that everything was correct. This was sealed with an initial.

This new procedure was a bit quicker than the old one, I had to admit, although it didn't look like it early in the morning. Now to the counter of the 90 days. And again to the copy shop to make a copy of the brand new visa because I needed that for my work permit. No problem there either, so we were outside by eleven. On to the next address.

Work permit

I always have better memories of the Ministry of Employment. You don't have to tell the taxi driver in Chaeng Wattana where you want to go. Well before lunchtime we arrived at the office where they extend your work permit. Draw a number. Thirty people waiting in front of us, so we have lunch first. The office of the ministry is always occupied. Thai officials take turns lunching here.

It's my turn at a little after 1pm. Be happy because then it will go well. Yes, I dreamed that. My doctor's statement was incomplete. There was no statement that I had no venereal disease and no AIDS. The officer made my wife read the rules in Thai and said he couldn't issue a work permit if he didn't have such a statement based on a blood test.

What to do now, my wife asked him. Well, just take a moped taxi and go to the nearest clinic where they do such a blood test. The moped taxi drivers know exactly where that is, he assured my wife. And that was right. Five minutes later my blood was drawn. The fact that I am a blood donor, give blood every four months and that that blood is tested every time (for anything and everything) because I am over 60 was irrelevant. In the end it all worked out. We were back home before three o'clock in the afternoon. Time enough to take another nap before dinner.

Do you see, my wife said, that the whole paper thing can be done quickly? As long as I go with you, and she winked. There I stood, with my mouth full of teeth and a Band-Aid on my finger.

Chris de Boer

Chris de Boer has been working as a lecturer in marketing and management at Silpakorn University since 2008.

'Wan di, wan mai di' means Good times, bad times. This posting is the nineteenth of a series on everyday events. Part 18 appeared on October 16. Part 20 next week.