Maarten Vasbinder lives in Isaan for 1½ years, where he met a wonderful woman with whom he shares joys and sorrows. His profession is general practitioner, a profession that he mainly practiced in Spain. On Thailandblog he answers questions from readers and writes about medical facts.
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Hello Maarten,
I have been married to a Thai lady for 7 years. We are now 36 and 62 respectively (to avoid any misunderstanding I am the oldest). We have everything our heart desires and are both beyond wishless happy. Except for one point on her part. She has an irrepressible desire to have children that I can't talk her out of. She apparently foresees my untimely death and child or children can then help her with old age when I have fallen away. Of course I have made financial provision for her 'for later', but that should not ban her wish. I'm not looking for 'funny' advice (enough friends who want to 'help' me and my wife) but I'm seriously looking for what to do.
She has never been married to me. I do and have two children from that previous marriage, so it would be second leg for me. We are both healthy and straight in body and limbs, both do not use any medication.
To be honest, I have to admit that my potency has declined rapidly in recent years and I am happy if I squeeze out a drop once every three days, but we are satisfied with our sex life.
Now the question is which is the right way to solve this? Which doctor should I look for and what are the other options in this area? Is this a costly road? Or can you refer me to libido and sperm enhancers or both? There is a lot to be found on this subject on the internet but I prefer to hear from an expert in the medical field how to act and what to do
I am an expat and have been living in Thailand for years, so I am no longer dependent on Dutch doctors.
Also, the subject is quite sensitive for the delicate Thai soul, so I promised to look into it seriously and discuss the result positively or negatively with her.
Thank you in advance for your info.
Regards,
J.
˜˜˜˜˜˜˜
Dear J,
If I understand correctly, your wife won't get pregnant. If that situation has been going on for more than a year, it could be that one or both of you are no longer fertile. The first step is to have it investigated.
If it turns out that your wife is fertile and you are no longer fertile, you will start thinking about a sperm donor. If it is the other way around, then there is the possibility of an egg donor.
If you are both fertile, but the amount of sperm is small or not very virile, then there is the possibility of in vitro fertilization of one or more eggs with your sperm cells. The embryo or embryos will then be implanted in your wife's uterus.
In Bangkok there are many clinics that do that. I can't advise you on any costs, but it won't be cheap.
I recommend that you visit your wife's gynecologist together and seek further advice there.
Of course you could also consider adoption.
Pills won't really help you.
For addresses etc. Look on google: “in vitro fermentation in Thailand”
Sincerely,
Maarten
Chiang Mai Government Hospital.
Specialized and affordable.
There are so many new techniques. Often banned in the Netherlands due to ethnic and Christian beliefs. But they run in eg Ixci
Is more pleasant to read in Dutch.
Good luck
I myself was 62 when I married my Thai wife (then 30 years old). She wanted children, I already have an adult son and an adult daughter. She immediately became pregnant and now we have a 4-year-old son.
A sister-in-law was unable to have children because of cysts in her uterus, another sister-in-law had cyst surgery and unexpectedly became pregnant.
When my wife went to the gynecologist for a check-up after the birth, he also found cysts in my wife and asked whether my wife might have had help to get pregnant, to which I spontaneously said: Yes, of course she had help from me . There was a moment of silence and I saw and heard the gynecologist think until suddenly a smile came on his face and he realized it.
I understood that even when cysts occur, the woman could become pregnant with the help of medication.