Pleasures and displeasures in Isaan, a few short stories 

An ordinary morning, The Inquisitor is up early and steps into the bathroom for a nice shower. No water comes out of the tap. Jesus, what now? Towel on, take the keys and head for the pump house. The water pump does not run, but nothing serious to discover. Then first make coffee and acquire energy through the caffeine. The device does not work. Only now does the sleepy Inquisitor realize, once again there is no electricity.

So no water, no shower, no coffee, no internet. Um, yes, and manually flush the toilet.

The Inquisitor, patient because of Isaan's experience, then decides to drive to the town and get some supplies at a food stall somewhere. Can he go straight to the bank and fill up with gas for the motorcycle. A ride for nothing.

The entire region is without electricity. 'Large cable works' have started. And immediately, outside the town itself, there are also about six villages without power. The two traffic lights in the town do not work, and despite fairly calm traffic, there is chaos. The Inquisitor was also unable to refuel at any of the three gas stations. The note hanging at the entrance of the bank no longer needs to be read by a native: banks can't work either, of course. In the covered market it is even hotter than usual because there are no working fans.

The 7/11, the Lotus Express: no light, no cooling.

It will last well into the afternoon before electricity is restored. At half power, but all devices had already been removed from the socket as a precaution. The Inquisitor had already adapted in the past with regard to internet, our provider in the neighboring village also regularly fails during such power cuts, but the national TrueMove that he had purchased as a reserve is also out, the cable to the high mast has probably been accidentally cut…

Annoying such a day. Do not report anything in advance. Do not specify a time period. Restarting at half power, are you lucky they don't do it with 'overpower', 250 volts or something, also happens often.

Tuesday afternoon, it's around two o'clock. Liefje-sweet is extremely cheerful. Someone from the village has won the illegal lottery. Net one thousand nine hundred and twenty unexpected bahts available. That should be celebrated is the winner's opinion, and she comes to our shop with some family members and friends. The Inquisitor had just half-emptied his pond to change the water when the cries of joy reached him, sweetheart had double-checked the numbers in the shop.

And yes, there are many more to come. Facebook and Line had already been notified, the gossip circuit reached those without. Congratulations, smiling and hopeful faces. Of course, the lady will treat. Without regard to persons, everyone must share in her good karma.

No one worries that food has to be put on the table at home, they scrape it together in the nearby fields and forests, sit down on the ground and prepare it while drinking. Quickly telephone children and relatives that there is food in the 'farang shop'. No one worries about work being left behind. No one worries in anything. So is The Inquisitor, who can appreciate such spontaneous expressions of happiness. He will clean and refill the pond tomorrow.

And the fact that the lottery win has disappeared after a few hours does not worry the woman either.

This is Isan.

Sometimes it drives sweet The Inquisitor crazy. Has she gotten out of bed on the wrong side, is she just tired of everything, is she even a bit farang-tired, he suspects. Then she asserts herself, is bossy, not at all Isan-happy. Usually The Inquisitor can help her out of that with some jokes and jokes, but not today.

The Inquisitor wants the mornings to himself. Get up early and wake up slowly. He finds a long shower blissful, and even if it is thirty-five degrees, he turns on the hot water boiler, he wants soft lukewarm water. He is told that this is 'not necessary at all'. The Inquisitor, worthy of his temper and still ignorant that sweetheart is in a stormy mood, reacts peevishly : 'you set the air conditioning to twenty degrees and then you need a duvet, isn't that the same waste?'. Oh dear.

After the morning shower, which should have been trouble-free, De Inquisitor likes to sit on the upper terrace, have a cup of coffee, switch on a laptop and use the internet. It knows that, has become a tradition, takes an hour or two because there is also blogging. Only around half past eight De Inquisitor then goes down to the shop. But the damage has already been done by the shower incident.

The deliciously smelling coffee has only just been poured when a request comes. She wants to do the laundry. 'Can't we do that in an hour or so?'. Oh dear.

Some murmuring, flat Isanian that The Inquisitor understands nothing of, but which he hears well through the open sash windows. Trying to avoid the storm, The Inquisitor goes downstairs. "Couldn't he have brought those dirty glasses from yesterday?"

Jesus, too late, this is going to be one of those days.

And yes. She has to go to Mei Soong for something she might as well do later. Bored the Inquisitor in the shop for an hour. Once back, she wants to fertilize her vegetables. Bored the Inquisitor in the shop for another two hours. She wants to go to the market herself. She has promised to mend some of her brother's clothes. She has to make food, very extensive today. This continues until The Inquisitor explodes, there is a limit. From then on he only gets a picture, no sound. Not even when good customers show up who want to joke with us over a drink. The Inquisitor is completely ignored by the love. And so the necessary translations are not forthcoming, The Inquisitor loses the thread of the story and with it his interest, he just dozes off.

Only in the evening, while taking a shower, does her thunderstorm begin to subside. A knee strike here, an elbow there. Which, of course, the farang answered. Once in bed there is the traditional make-up, The Inquisitor leaves it to the imagination of the reader.

Afterwards, also traditional, a kind of conversation, always the same :

He: "What happened to you today?" She: 'I don't know, I didn't feel good about myself.'

He: 'But what…' – but is interrupted. "Don't talk about it anymore, it's over." Understand who can.

Even in Isan the momentum of the nations is unstoppable. Slowly but surely new things are coming in the nearby town that make life more pleasant.

Such an improvement is the new 'Lotus Thalaad'. That is the middle version of a Lotus Express, a kind of mini-mart, and the large Lotus warehouses. It had only just opened and De Inquisitor curiously went to take a look. A bakery attached, croissants available, nice. A little more choice in vegetables, no imports yet, but still. Extensive range of meat and finally non-chopped chicken available.

And fish, filleted even, never seen here.

The gossip circuit was already talking about the Lotus coming, but De Inquisitor was of the opinion that it would take months before it would actually open.

But behold, they are already open four weeks after construction started!

On top of that, they now sell here, also in town of course, the type of motorcycle The Inquisitor brought from Pattaya, Honda PSX. He was in trouble with maintenance. They didn't have this type here, so no parts either. Air filters, oil filters, ... all had to be ordered in Bangkok. Pay in advance, no thank you.

Because De Inquisitor also had no confidence in the skills of the mechanics.

Now someone is taking a course for service and repair of this type. Can a ten thousand kilometer maintenance be carried out at last? After fifteen thousand kilometers….

But live better again!

And the highlight: a farang, an Englishman, has opened a small restaurant in the nearby town. Small menu but that doesn't bother De Inquisitor. Hamburgers. Pizzas. Lasagna. Shepherd's pie. Spaghetti. A real English breakfast with all the trimmings. Open for about three weeks, De Inquisitor has been there at least a dozen times, delicious, don't feel like cooking, go ahead, grab a quick bite to eat!

The weather is pleasant, not too hot, not too bright sun, cloud veils keep the heat back a bit. Accompanied by bitch LinLin, De Inquisitor walks slowly over the Isan roads. Simply, just because he feels like it. Pretty soon he steps off the track, onto a natural walkway, into the rice fields. A wonderful view because here and there, usually on the dikes, there are trees that interrupt the endless flat green. The rice bends in the gentle breeze, reflected in the water that is now high everywhere because of the nightly rains. That water is also full of life. Toads, frogs. Shrimp if you look closely. Also fish, small and fast darting back and forth, looking for food.

A little further, far from the houses, The Inquisitor encounters a few , buffaloes. Beasts in which he has little confidence: high shoulders, bulky waist, but it is mainly those penetrating, large black eyes that do it for him. The Inquisitor always fantasizes that these mastodons stare at him with less good intentions. Although they are gentle cows, because once again they are under the care of a young man, less than ten years old, estimates De Inquisitor. And he takes pleasure in the mistrust of the farang, who only briefly walks around to be sure, despite the fact that this costs him wet feet. LinLin decides to return home, she has four week old puppies to nurse.

Less than an hour later, The Inquisitor settles into one of those countless, typical shaky huts that are scattered here and there, a shady place for the farmers - who are now nowhere to be seen in fields or roads, nature is currently doing the work. You can still see that people ate and drank here, Isaaners never clean up messes. It is full of empty bags, bottles and other rubbish. What a colony of ants sees as useful, they en masse carry things, many times larger than themselves, to an unknown place that is probably their nest. Zealous critters. Numerous flies that attract geckos also purr. Who in turn bring the larger tokkei's to the hut because prey animals are present. The small pool next to the hut is full of frogs and that is the signal to become more attentive : it is quiet here, hardly any people around for several weeks, so ideal for snakes. Sure enough, The Inquisitor has learned to patiently look around and there she is. Not big, little color, but still, a snake.

Because he is not wearing closed shoes, only slippers, The Inquisitor carefully retreats and continues his journey. Gradually towards a village that is very cozy. Narrow streets, almost exclusively old, wooden houses on stilts. Everywhere shady trees, shrubs and other greenery, that is food supply close to home. The gardens are hardly enclosed, only with old tree trunks, but that also contributes to the coziness. There is rubbish and tools everywhere in the yards, sometimes modern, sometimes things that they used in Belgium a hundred years ago, this also contributes to the authenticity of the village. Light blue smoke from the charcoal fires on which they cook hangs under low canopies. Where they are eating they shout laughing . The Inquisitor plans to really go into that one of the weeks, he wants to see how they react.

Poa Chang wants to chat, so does May Dee. A lot of sign language is needed but we get out, yes, everything is fine, no I'm just walking because I like to do it, no, I don't want a beer. Only half an hour later can De Inquisitor continue, towards sweet who is lonely in the shop.

And who is happy because The Inquisitor feels good, so is she.

Yes, Isaan, The Inquisitor likes it, many pleasures, despite the few displeasures!