A new form of blackmail in a bad marriage between Thai and Farang
In a sign that some marriages between Thai and Farang are less happy, several Britons are having trouble convincing their wives to provide the identity card or the original marriage certificate. This is required to get a visa year extension on the basis of marriage. But what happens if the woman refuses to cooperate?
In one case, it led to an almost violent altercation near the parking lot of the immigration complex in Jomtien. The Thai woman demanded that her British husband hand over 50.000 baht or she would refuse to confirm to officials that the marriage was still going on. In another case, the woman said she had hidden the original marriage certificate and would only show it if the family car was registered in her name.
Immigration officials said the easiest way to extend the stay for a year was to retire, which is allowed for foreigners over 50, whether married or single. However, it requires a lump sum or annual income totaling at least 800.000 baht, while – for married men only – the lower limit drops dramatically to 400.000 baht if one can prove that one is married. The latter is an attractive option.
Richard, 62, from Somerset, said: “I married a Thai nine years ago and we have always visited the Immigration Office together to provide all the required documents, as well as my 400.000 baht passbook. However, our marriage has been collapsing lately and my wife is now demanding cash payment for her cooperation. She says otherwise I should apply for the pension option, but she knows I don't have the 800.000 baht. My only other option is to go back to England. Her response: “I don't care! ”
A lawyer at V2B International Law Services said: “Unfortunately, a growing number of long-term marriages of this type appear to be in trouble. The British husband often experienced declining income year after year, perhaps due to the deterioration in the value of the pound or due to capital losses over the years, which led to marital dissatisfaction. Another fact is that Thai women now realize that they will not receive a state pension if their British husband dies.
V2B says the problem is not limited to Britons, but most cases have so far reached them. “Many Brits came to Thailand 20 years ago to retire. Some now feel that Pattaya is no longer a cheap option for their old age. UK pensions have fallen in absolute terms and the rising cost of living here, plus medical insurance and hospital costs, has clearly created tensions in some marriages. ”
While no formal figures are provided in Thailand, many sources believe that the cost of living here has at least doubled in the last 20 years.
Source: Pattaya Mail
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This topic has not yet been discussed in Thailandblog and also in the forums as far as I read them: do Dutch people and Belgians have such stable marriages?
As for the British, their pound has fallen sharply against other currencies and the complaints about not meeting minimum requirements have already started since the minimums now required were set. There are British people in Thailand who only have a state pension, which is often lower than our AOW. Well, and if you don't have a piggy bank...
You have marital problems everywhere and you have to work them out together. If that doesn't work, they show you the door, bring grandma and grandpa into the house, refuse the 'bed work' and now the stamp can also be a means to get rid of you. My advice: bite the bullet and then do what she wants: leave. And look who comes back with hanging legs?
If the man indeed has to leave because of her attitude, it will become clear that she is doing something wrong. But a really broken relationship? Then gluing is pointless.
Can you still say that you are married in such a case?
Legally yes, of course, but I wouldn't call it a marriage.
Can't you get proof from the municipality that the marriage still exists?
That livelihood doubled I believe was in Big C yesterday. shopping and what was in the cart was far too much in relation to what I had to pay.
Are you cheaper at the Aldi or Lidll in the Netherlands, had to tap 2200 baht for a little shopping.
Just daily groceries bought nothing special.
Dear Caspar,
livelihoods have not doubled at all. For the years that I have lived here, I have kept an excel file in which the expenses for living expenses are stored. This does NOT indicate a doubling of the cost of living in Thailand. You have to charge in the local currency (THB) and not in your own currency because it depends on its value against the THB. So this has nothing to do with the doubling of livelihood here, but with its own currency depreciation.
And that the Englishman mentioned by Leo th has financial problems is not surprising. If your recreation is drinking in the bars, owning a Mia Noi and even renting a flat for it, then yes, you are living in a very expensive way. Then you don't have to complain but adjust your lifestyle.
Every coin has two sides so why those ladies ask for a financial compensation I leave it in the middle only to her it will often not lie.
Switching to a retirement visa is of course possible if you have 400.000 in your bank account and you can demonstrate the other half via pension contribution.
With this visa, the 'home owner' must also sign for the visa extension and yes, who is that usually yes your wife.
Water with the wine so it seems to me and bite through the sour apple the 'golden' days are certainly over for the British.
The fall in the price in the past ten years alone has brought a lot of misery, but yes, counting yourself rich is an art that not only Thais are good at.
Agree with William that every coin has two sides. And every house has its cross, as an outsider you can of course not see what is happening within the household. The Thai wife is accused of blackmail, but who knows, she may have been promised cows with golden horns in the past, and the farang currently only contributes sparingly to the household and spends his money on entertainment outside the home. So now that lady sees her chance and asks for something in return for her cooperation in the form of a financial contribution or, as I read in a response, the car in her name. I am not saying that this situation is the case in all cases, there will also be plenty of farangs who are financially 'gassed' by a greedy Thai partner. In the Netherlands, half of all marriages now end on the rocks. What percentage applies to marriages concluded in Thailand between Thais and farangs, I wouldn't know, but everything will not be all roses scent and moonshine there either. Financially, the Thai partners will usually be dependent and that can have unpleasant consequences in the long run. Now a number of farangs depend on the cooperation of their partner and you should of course never get into such a situation. But if there is no more love or at least mutual respect then you should still decide to break up. When you can no longer comply with the Thai immigration rules, namely doubling to 800.000 baht in a Thai bank account or being able to demonstrate sufficient monthly income, there is no other option than to leave Thailand. That is particularly hard, especially when you have been living in Thailand for years and may no longer have any ties in your native country. And it is easier said than done but the reality is that immigration is regulated worldwide.
I don't quite understand this Englishman. If he has lived here for many years and probably also knows compatriots who also have problems with their income, then he must also be familiar with the shortcuts that exist to stay here. He doesn't even have to stay with his wife. There is plenty to rent.
He just needs to use his wits, pack his bags and take his loss and get on with life.
We all know by now that it is doom and gloom for a considerable group of foreigners in Thailand and one hole is being closed with another. This week I had a conversation with an Englishman from Wales. He was in the process of renting a condo for his mia noi. I estimate him to be in his late fifties and he was said to have been in Thailand for 18 years. He was struggling financially and for several years he had a bad relationship with his wife with whom he still lives. They have a child together. He has his own room, in which he locks himself. His outings are the bar visits, as one of the few bright spots in his life and a lot of money is spent on alcohol. He complained bitterly about the fact that he was struggling financially. The sex is then sought at a mia noi and that costs money of course. The best man looked very unhealthy and he could not pay much and thought of taking out an annual contract, so that he had to pay less per month. This man is also in a blackmailable position and also resides on the basis of marriage with a Thai woman. To date, his wife still agrees with his donations, but his words showed that there was more to it.
Which is also a more often heard problem for the foreigner who has bought a home in Thailand on the basis of a Thai (fake) BV and has three so-called Thai employees for that purpose. One of the requirements to be able to do this. In our neighborhood there were several who could no longer find a "reliable" Thai to support their lie for the small amount that is known as common. People want to see more money these days or refuse further cooperation. An Englishman sold his house at a considerable loss and returned to England, who could no longer cope.
If your wife is blackmailing you in a marriage, it is better to end the marriage. I can imagine that especially older men no longer have the courage to leave.
This week I saw films about people who leave for Greece or Bulgaria, where they can live with their modest pension. Fat is also a nice alternative…only if you see the choice of foods such as many types of salami…
When I could no longer live with my wife, I will certainly look into that.
For Thai, partner fidelity and helping each other in lesser times may mean something different than with farang, but if you are being blackmailed by your partner, then I would ask myself what my relationship is still worth.
Bite through, show that you will get further than her when you are no longer in her life.
I suspect that some farang are too meek and feel sorry for Thai women, who all had such bad Thai partners before we came into their lives.
Ask yourself how far she would be without you.
You can be good, but please don't let your goodness be taken advantage of, pack up and go.
Good luck and success,
Jozef
Totally agree with the previous speaker. Came to Thailand on holiday every year with my wife more than 30 years ago. Enjoying the people, the food, temp. and think differently. Retirement in 2008 and living in Thailand. My wife passed away in 2013, but told me before she left that I should continue to enjoy Thailand and be open to a relationship. Later I started a relationship that I thought was going to work and financially I have no problem but I also ran into a wall .. I have learned that loving "" in Thailand has a completely different meaning than Western ideas
Ben Gill,
You hit the nail on the head!! Cultural difference is very large, and love is measured in money and goods in 90% of a mixed relationship.
When the day comes when things don't go as planned, love usually cools down.
I too have been going to this beautiful country for 35 years, and unfortunately met a lot of destitute farang and few marriages that lasted.
Of course and fortunately there are also happy marriages among them, but apparently it seems easier than it is, especially the adjustment usually only has to come from the farang.
So many want a farang, but so few are willing to adapt a bit.
Enjoy this beautiful country, hopefully we can return soon.
Jozef
I,
You can go back if you want. Quarantine for 2 weeks.
So a few weeks of vacation is unfortunately not really useful yet.